You're Only the Best I Ever Had..
"This has been the most intimate relationship I have ever been in. I don't know if you believe me, since you always think I'm lying, but I really honestly mean this."
Sunday, September 20, 2009
And as you kissed my hand after saying it, I knew it was the truth. :)
It was mine too.
Thank you for being the best I've had. At least we have 3 weeks until we succumb to reality. :)
Of course, only we will have the most romantic and beautiful break up ever. That's why I love us. We are always special! hahaha :)
lav closed her eyes and prayed @ 03:03 p.m.
My Silent Prayer
What can I say..
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
What can I do..
But offer this heart oh God,
Completely to You.
lav closed her eyes and prayed @ 09:35 p.m.
The Perfect Email Devotion at the Perfect Time
I have never been this emotionally vulnerable at work, where I can't almost do anything besides want to rush to my car and drive to a quiet carpark at cry to no end.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
How can reading something make someone so sad, when I was perfectly contented just hours before?
SIGH. At least we still have our silver lining. :)
"Then the righteous will shine like the sun in the kingdom of their Father. He who has ears, let him hear." Matthew 13:43 (NIV)
Last week my seven-year-old son and I were waiting for his sister to get her hair cut. As we sat in the waiting area, we had no choice but to listen to the radio that played in the background. The forecast came on and the announcer said that it was going to be partly cloudy. My son, who was playing with LEGOsŪ on the floor, stopped playing and looked up with an indignant look on his face. "Mom," he said, "That man said it's partly cloudy but it's not. It's partly sunny." Then he went back to playing.
Oh, to see the world the way my son did in that moment. He taught me a huge lesson on perspective that day and I have been mulling it over ever since.
Do I see my days as partly sunny or partly cloudy? Do I marvel at the wonders or get caught up in the mess? Do I consciously choose to alter my "glass half empty" mentality and choose to see it as half full? Do I rejoice in what I have or focus on what's missing?
Just for today, let's focus on the good things that happen, so they don't get lost in the shuffle of life. I hope that you will join me in seeking to see our days as partly sunny. Sure, a few clouds may enter our horizon, but that doesn't mean our outlook has to be altered.
Partly cloudy or partly sunny? My son taught me it's all in how I look at it.
Dear Lord, when life starts looking cloudy, help me to remember that the sun is still shining. Help me to take my negative, defeating thoughts captive and shift my perspective. Most of all, help me to remember that as one of Your children, I will someday shine like the sun in Your kingdom. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
lav closed her eyes and prayed @ 04:35 p.m.
Tomorrow I know if all of this has been worthwhile. Tomorrow I know if my pain ends once and for all.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Tomorrow I also know if what I had deluded myself to believe in is now false. Tomorrow I also know if I am just not good enough.
Tomorrow you see, holds almost no promise for me. Just alot of tears.
But yet I thought today, that maybe it would only happen tomorrow. Maybe today I would still be able to smile and laugh and show that hope.
That was until today transpired and I realised that as I sat there with my closest friends, that I may never be able to have the love, the life, and the joy my friends have.
That's when I realised that my hope wasn't going to be dashed tomorrow.
It was already dashed. There is no more if. It's just is.
At least, I won't have to listen to it alone tho. That alone is a comfort like no other. :)
lav closed her eyes and prayed @ 11:55 p.m.
Sometimes I wonder if work is my coping mechanism or an overwhelming mechanism.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
I have Part One of the biggest project of my life tomorrow and yet I'm closer to tears than I am to excitement.
Sigh. I don't like these nights. I have had too many in my life.
Make me smile again, please? :)
lav closed her eyes and prayed @ 09:21 p.m.
Wishing and hoping!
Last five minutes of the celebration of my new quarter of a century existence and I have the same wish!
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
3 cakes and counting, 3 wishes and counting.
Please let it happen Lord! :) Pretty please!!
lav closed her eyes and prayed @ 11:56 p.m.
Thank You Mr Postman
You know how you wake up some days feeling so ugh because you know how much work and stuff you have to complete?
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
And it doesn't help that you have to please various stakeholders on the ONE week that you are allowed to be the one who is pampered?
But then just as you are about to launch into some negative wallow and get all snappy at everyone, life throws you your biggest surprise!
Who would have thought a simple errand like buying lunch and checking mail would uncover the single most beautiful thing that is enough to make my month? :) There in a pile of credit card bills, promotional mailers, hospital appointments lay two well-concealed envelopes I never thought I would find.
Thank you sweethearts. It's like you know me better than I know myself! hahaha :D
I just can't stop smiling!!
How I wish you actually read this blog. :P
lav closed her eyes and prayed @ 01:35 p.m.
Work hasn't started yet!
This is amazing. Last week of holidays and I was in school by 10.45am today and I have been doing work non stop!
Monday, June 22, 2009
I could still do work except I am REALLY tired and am gona catch a nap before replying the rest of the emails.
SIGH!! I miss my kids but I can't really be this much of a workaholic!
lav closed her eyes and prayed @ 03:48 p.m.
I'm back. :)
So after the perfunctory and sometimes furtive blogging of January-March, I decided to stop chronicling my not-so-exciting thoughts and musings. Maybe it was the stress of work that tired me out so much, maybe I just didn't have much to say that I hadn't already told everyone, maybe I didn't want to write perfunctory details that would bore the death out of people. Or maybe I thought, I had just outgrown this stage in my life. :)
Monday, June 22, 2009
But in these last few weeks, as I often sat in the quiet of my room, thinking about 2009 and how exciting yet simple it has been, I realised that I could never outgrow journaling. I had taken to airing it via FB updates, MSN/G-chat nicks, or sometimes in that little journal I write in at night in before I turn in and say my nightly prayers.
But the blogger in me missed this online portal that only a select few are privy too. I missed the little pictures I could add in for a dose of colour, the running commentary that others would give, the constant lags in post updates, the occasional pornographic spammer, but most of all, I missed writing. And I suppose as I stand here, days from turning a quarter of a century, I realise the need to make sense of life and maybe just whine a little.
So I'm back. :) Don't be bored! hahaha
lav closed her eyes and prayed @ 02:33 a.m.